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For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Another Fine Homemade Parachute Page, Crafted With Love

Freedom Moose

Le fete du Canada 2017

Jul 1, 2017 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Yet Another Hamburger Cake

Jul 5, 2016 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Hot Dog Cake

Not vegan, but still ironic.

May 19, 2016 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Vegan Hamburger Cake

Life is full of ironies…

May 19, 2016 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Rush Cookies

Jun 30, 2015 under Rush & For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Poutine Cake

Almost as healthy as the real thing…

Jul 5, 2014 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

James Joyce Donut Upside Down Cake, 2013

A two-fer on this three-fer. It’s nice to have meaningful cultural traditions. One day this might actually start to look like Jimmy. Or Nora.

Jul 17, 2013 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Hamburger Cake, 2012 Edition

Couldn't find the orange fondant for the cheese, but hey, gotta leave something for the Mark III.

Jun 13, 2012 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Rainbow Cupcakes

Fuck it, made all the fancy colours, but not chocolate, and then no one bothered to eat them. So, chocolate or nothing from here on out!

Jun 2, 2012 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Treasure Chest, 2012 Edition

Perhaps a failure, ultimately, for not having the structural support of the first version, nor the brown woodgrain icing. The abundance of candy seemed to make up for that with its audience…

May 30, 2012 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

James Joyce Donut Upside Down Cake, 2012

James Joyce, God of Love. Because he is, right?

Mar 17, 2012 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Valentine's Day, 2012

Another year, another heart.

Feb 14, 2012 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Noah’s Sixth Birthday

How the heck is Daddy s’posed to make a Space Shuttle out of cake? Sometimes you just gotta ask for help… Now, when asked what planet she wanted, Noah shouted out “Uranus!” Which is funny mostly because it was a perfect “bum” joke, which she thinks are the funniest things ever, but she didn’t even get this one. The tribulations of becoming six…

Everyone helped draw the aliens on the planet, including Mommy! You go, Mom!

Jan 22, 2012 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Octopod!

Octopod cake, for no other reason than I thought it would be a challenge. But man those children are picky: “Is that Barnacles? Or Kwazi?” How much detail can you add with a gel icing pen? At least Tweak and Tunip are recognizable.

Aug 6, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

The Lunch Run in 12 Parsecs

Millennium Falcon for the office treat day. Not cake, exactly. The idea came from thinking of olives and cheese. Note, though, that cheese is far from the ideal sculpting material. Too brittle, or too floppy, plain old cheddar seems the best combination of strength and bendiness.

Aug 3, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Jobsmas Cake

The Jobsmas Cake is a time-honored tradition in my family. Is Jobsmas Cake vegan? You bet your PlayBook it is. Crumby.... Just like your Xoom.... Not unibody, though; next year, we make next level cake assembly!

Jun 7, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Wormy Dirt

Many laughs ensued throughout the week as the kids grimaced at the idea of eating dirt and worms, but once they'd seen it made, they were all over that. The kids who hadn't seen it get made stuck with the regular cake. Their loss.

May 8, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Cookie Log

Donuts wrapped in cookie dough covered in chocolate with cookie code written on top. Definitely hard to erase from your cache.

May 3, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Just Because Cake

Colours, colours, and more colours. Don't tell Mommy that the pink permanently stained the countertops....

Mar 29, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Cakeopalypse!

Oreo cookies? Check
Mini donuts? Check
Chopped up brownie? Check
Reeces peanut butter cups? Check
Cupcakes? Check
All mixed up and baked together? Madness ensues.
This one’s probably going to take a week or two to work through, and sadly Marcus was sick.

Feb 23, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Noah’s 5th Birthday (Daycare Edition)

The thought of 22 little kids running around with neon blue tongues is endlessly appealing....

Jan 20, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Drunken Penguin Cake

Do your penguins drain your liquor cabinet too?

It's not enough that this thieving little bugger had Guinness, whisky, and Kahlua in ’him, he’s got a bottle of rum, too. Whoever finished the last piece could have the rum, but I haven’t found out who that was....

Jan 19, 2011 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Daddy-O’s Birthday

Gotta work on my icing techniques (and ears). Negotiations for the leftover's focused on whether two eyes equaled one eye and an ear (they are).

Dec 19, 2010 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Sasha’s Third Birthday

Not sure how I talked them into this, but for Sasha's 3rd birthday party we made a treasure chest cake. There are lots of better ones out there, and this one now seems like a prototype, which is weird, because I don't see another one on any horizon soon. The kids liked the candy more than the cake, which is maybe a bit strange, as they should've been pretty hopped up on Hallowe'en candy still....

Nov 7, 2010 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Sasha’s Actual Third Birthday

On Sasha’s actual birthday, Mom was sick, so I took an unexpected day off. When asked what they wanted to do that morning, both girls said, without prompting, “make cake”. Okay. What kind? “Speedboat cake” says Sasha Lucy. What does that look like? Noah hold her hands apart as if measuring a fish and says “like this”. And, says Sasha, it has to be red.

I look at my ingredients, and figure I have about enough to make a single round cake, and figure out a way to make something a bit tugboaty. So we mix the dough and bake it, then let it cool a bit, and I cut it, and use a cookie cutter to make two fish from the cut away part, and then make two kinds of frosting to decorate it, and put some portholes on with Smarties. When all done, Sasha takes a look at it and says “I said speedboat.” That’s when I fire up the iPad and play Cee Lo Green’s new hit song. Marcus at the office says “Hey, they’re perfect clients!”

Nov 1, 2010 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Hamburger Cake

Yet another office treat, the Hamburger Cake. Made the "french fries" out of cookie dough earlier, and made two round cakes, one chocolate and one plain, then sliced them up and iced them. Tried to make a slice of "cheese" out of an orange pancake, but that was an abject failure for some reason.

Anyways, this isn't a bad prototype (which makes me want to do it again, maybe for someone's wedding?), but a) it needs more icing, b) needs more shapes in there (some red and green small pancakes would make for good tomatoes and pickles), and c) thicker cakes. Still, it got a good laugh.

Oct 26, 2010 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Fathers' Day 2010 (Party Version)

Better in concept than execution, the rocket ship cake got a little out of hand. Note to self: red whipping cream is really hard to make, it just turns salmon pink.

Inspired, however, was the hamburger moon the rocketship is heading towards. Does anything symbolize Fathers' Day as much as rocketships and burgers?

Jun 20, 2010 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Fathers' Day 2010 (Daycare Version)

Made for Noah + Sasha's daycare party; everyone likes a snail, right? The face looked a little better until Sasha Lu, the family klutz, "smooshed" it and some hasty repair work was called for. Must remember to reserve some icing of each colour for just this kind of fix up....

Jun 18, 2010 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

St. Patrick's Day

My turn at the office for Treat Day fell on St. Paddy's Day, and I'd seen this recipe for a Doughnut Upside Down Cake, and really, when else are you going to get to use that, except for the office, where an extravagant disaster is almost expected? All it needed was a green batter, and little drawing of JJ on the top....

When it was done, I wrote to the recipe's author that "I used full-size donuts, which I must say wasn't ideal, because they rose up in the batter, being less dense, while it was baking, so it turned out a little messier than hoped for"; she kindly (and astutely) wrote back:

"Although the doughnuts rising up in the batter -- as if trying to escape from the oppressive forces holding them down -- does seem rather apropos for a James Joyce cake, does it not?"

Since then, I always think of Joyce as writing "I go to encounter for the millionth time the reality of experience and to forge in the smithy of my soul the uncreated conscience of my cake." And maybe he did, and Pound changed it on him....

Mar 17, 2010 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!

Daddy's Birthday

A moon cake seemed like a fun idea, and cutting a template out of waxed paper to drizzle icing sugar also seemed like a good idea. Actually worked better than it should have, but perhaps not as good as I'd hoped. Lifting the template off was a little messier, so some of the finer details of Rigel (top left) were obliterated....

Dec 19, 2009 under For Fuck’s Sake, It’s Cake!